Critical Studies and The social interatction of the first years.

I've been thinking about my critical studies group a bit. Talked it over with a few other students.

The wierd thing is, I talk to just about everyone in my critical studies group indepenantly. Admitedly some are less talkative than others, thats fine. But when we're in a group, with a tutor asking questions, there is always an odd silence. I dont see why. Maybe theyre intimidated by Mike? Or maybe the feel that If they are wrong they will be scolded, or seem stupid, or unfit for the course? Or maybe Im completely wrong and they are just about to awnser or theyre thinking about the awnser?

I always try to break the silence, even if I dont know the awnser (More than often I'll have a sketchy idea of the awnser, but not be correct.). I dont have much fear of being wrong. I'll gladly give a wrong awnser if it gives someone the chance to give the right one. But the question is why dont they awnser if they knew the correct awnser? There are other problems to be giving the wrong awnser, I can easily do it to every question given and not feel embarresed. There are an infinate number of wrong awnsers to correct, with those odds its understandable. But if I do, It would seem like I know nothing. It would also seem like that if I gave no awnser at all. So perhaps Im losing nothing by awnsering. If I awnsered to every question, I would imagine everyone would be annoyed with me for tryin to awnser. So why dont they awnser more confidently if they know the awnser? If a nucular misslie was about to launch and they knew the code to deactivate it, would they wait untill someone punches in the wrong code before pausing and entering the correct one? Probably not, but I'd like to see that.

There's nothing wrong with being wrong, I feel. It just shows that theres something you dont know.The more you know, the more you know you dont know.

Which is a pain in the ass, because Im seriously forgetfull and have to relearn everything I forgot a day or two ago.
Sure, maybe I'd give the correct awnsers if I read more and watched more and thought more. Somehow doing this stresses me out alot more than just doing the work. The good thing about critical studies is that I think about these things more. Even though Im still confused about most things.

My year seems to not be a very social year, we've made no social events even though there have been many birthdays been and gone. We seem to have fallen into small groups, very small groups. I'd rather not be in any group, although I feel as if I have fallen into one. I would like to do some large drawing events with the others on the course in my year, but I dont think anyone would care. Such as, the third years offered an event where they would do some drawing, a "Sketch-off" was planned at a pub.
Only 3 first years (including me) showed up. And even than, only I drew. (With the exception of some second years.) I didnt see a single third year with a sketchbook. I saw them with drinks, quite happily talking to eachother in a large group. Even though they didnt set out to what they had wanted. (A sketch off) They were still talking away to each other. Something the first years have never achived. Considering there is a chance I could work with any one of these people in the future, I would like to know and talk to them. I try to get people on board with what Im doing every now and again by word of mouth. But more than often they're simply not interested, or they say they are and than show no further interest, ask no questions or not tern up; now I've simply stoped asking. This wasnt to everyone ofcorse, so maybe I should start asking again, but a broader range of people. Hell, I probably seem like a wierdo to all of them, but if you dont ask you will never know. And not asking is worse than asking and being let down.

Not to mention the blogs, I feel like a moron for not writing more. I was never one to write. Maybe I need some sort of structure to my week, I still feel quite disorganised.

Task 9

Art direction in games is a critical stage in the production of game play, in today's market more than ever. Its the art directors job to ensure that all the in-game assets and artwork are made on time and are made to fit together in the game. The main idea is that the art director keeps up the consistent feel of the game and follows the theme, making sure other artists dont stray to far from it. The work along side the Project manager to set up briefs and task updates, making sure that the feedback is constantly being passed to the other sections of the game team in the pipeline.
The Art Director will also estimate the triangle count of each asset and how long the artist has to create the asset. This is to make sure that everything runs smoothly, the game cant be made if some assets are not made on schedule. If any major assets were delayed, this would have a ripple effect down the pipeline which would slow production as other artists try to find other work to do while they wait for the asset they wer supposed to be doing originally, or they wont do any work at all until they get it. It would seem Art direction is a creative role, however its more of a guide than the artist, the creativity seems to be channeled to the artists lower down the chain. That seems to be the role of the Art Director, to ensure that the art is tailored to fit the game and for it to be on schedule.

What's required to be a art director would seem to be vision and leadership skills. The lead artist would have to be able to pass his ideas onto others clearly and directly to get the results needed which would involve allot of mentoring to the artists. The Ard director would need to be a natural leader type, if the artists dont look up to the art director, they would believe that his feedback of their work is not correct, there needs to be this ladder making the artists look up the art director. The must be clear and precise about what they are saying in order to get their vision across to the artist, this position is not for the timid. Looking at the amount of people under you and the amount of work required, being shy about an idea could cause some serious problems down the pipeline if a problem is no corrected.

Looking through some job specifications, traditional skills is a must. Not only that they must have risen through the ranks by at least having 4 to 5 years experience in the gaming industry. This makes sense, if the art director was some random character who had no background in games, how could he direct artists? The art director must at some stage be an artist them self, this way they would know what is needed of a good Art Director, they would know first hand what is good management and what is bad.

What would I need to become an art director? Experience and knowledge of the industry. Simply, I can say at the moment my experience is little and my knowledge is sketchy. At the moment I can easily say I dont have the skills required. The real question is do I have what it takes to be an artist and the will to become an art director? It seems like allot of pressure.

Task 8

Game play can be considered the action part of the story in the game. It's what the player can and cant do inside the virtual world. Achualy taking hold of this object (charcter) and endulging in the fantasy of being that character, being in the enviroment and so on. Gameplay is how the viewer can make choices to change the outcomes of the game. Where something like a movie is vary liniar in its story not alowing the viewer to see the whole picture, a game alows the viewer to branch off into various other paths or branches which can be played through in multipul different ways. Gameplay is the interaction of the audience to the medium and the feeling the get playing it.

Often gameplay is pushed aside in many modern games, in the therory that the graphics or story will compensate. This doesnt make an ejoyable game to play, but something pretty to look at. Games like Pac-Man or Space Invaders at the core were good games, their graphics didnt matter at all. People replayed those games over and over, nothing new came out of replaying the game, no unlockables or hidden stages came out of beating them, they only got faster and harder to complete the second time. Many games of recent times belive that replayability means you get a new item or clothing map on the main character. There is enjoyment in getting unlockable prizes for completeing something, but its not something to base a game upon. The unlocking can get pretty tiring, once one realises how often its used.

Remember what you could unlock in the original SNES Super Metroid for completing it? No? Bad, good and Best Endings for completeing it within faster time frames. Remember playing it again because you though Samus was a man, only to find out she was a blond woman? Ofcorse. Remember fighting that giant robot bird thing? Ofcorse. Did you also know they remade the original for the game boy DS? Metroid Zero misson (its pretty much the same game, few new perks and what not). The game play is mostly the same, but with improved graphics, and more shit to unlock. What does all this Unlocking have to do with game play? Nothing! So why is it the most important part of the game? Because its easier to change a character model than make something exciting to play again and again without changing anything. Why was Pac-man fun to play, the unpredictability of the insainly simple AI Ghosts that always seemed to find you, no matter how many times you played it, they'd always go somewhere else. What could you unlock in packman for completing it? You couldnt complete it, it never ends, the background changes colour when you get to a new level, thats it.

For me, when I play a game I look for exscapisum and a exploration. However many things are also important, such as the game being realistic enough to belive in and fantasy enough so I can escape into a fantasy world. I often like to go back and replay games, as this allows me to look at the games details in depth, knowing whats going to happen next so I have time to look at the details of the game. I do love a good sandbox game.

Self Asesment Preasessment

Tomorrow is assessment, big panic for most, however I am not in a panic. Why? Well that’s simple, I know I haven’t done all the work but even if I had done all the work, I have not done enough work. I realised this as I was painting with acrylics a few days ago. I paint like a child.

Why do I paint like a child in acrylics? Simple, I have not progressed with painting, since I was a child, which was the last time I had used them. I’ve decided that I have to paint atleast once a day, I’ve been quite happily painting in my kitchen while I make my dinner of days. Making an acceptation for it, even though I have a lot of other work, Ive found a weak spot and am trying to correct it.

Wait, why haven’t I progressed with painting since than? Simple, I haven’t done any since than. Thus, like a capsule of the past, I haven’t grown from when I was a child. It’s quite humbling and rather charming, I also feel the same when I see an adult draw like a child. Its not that they can’t draw, its because they haven’t drawn. I’ve also asked why I haven’t become a better artist since last year, the answer is obvious. There is no reason why I should not not the artist I want to be yet. But yet I am not half the artist I want to be. It seems to always be just out of reach, I always question why. But the obvious is usally the hardest to see. Its like your nose, its always there, you can always see it, but at the same time you don’t, your mind blocks it out.

Why havn’t I done all the work? Just the same as everyone else who hasn’t, a lack of devotion to becoming the artist I want to be, not to the course. In a sense the course is just a boat, where as I have to swim to where I want to be, the boat can only take me so far. Distractions are easy and offer an empty reward. Where as studying is hard and offers reward in the future. I’m a patient person, I like waiting for that reward as I know It will be sweeter than any other. But Im weak and there for opt for distraction. That’s why I havnt done as much work as I should.
The only real option for me is to rid myself of all distraction. I’ve been socialising a fair bit, which may have added to my lack of progress. Im not saying its bad that I’ve socialised, I was once a very bitter, depressed person, still being so, but a lot more relaxed about it, it was a good thing. Maybe I should have balance the two better. I don’t really care for playing games or listening to music, so why do I? Im not huge on going out and parties, so why do I? Why should I do things I don’t like? My work isn’t where I want it to be, so what am I going to do?

I digi-paint alot of things by my desk. Its just easier than moving my pc.

I shouldn’t have taken this long for me to realise what I had to do. The fucking work. And than some more.
Im going to do more than what is simply asked of me and its going to count.
After all, its what I want and its what I have to do to get it. I'll stop being a little pussy and take it. The only good quality I have is when I say I'll do something, I do it.

Task 6

Task 6
It seems that most game journalists or reviewers can be attacked by all sides, but the game developers, their peers and by the audience they’re trying to win over. The internet surely doesn’t help the game review magazines, which are basically just buying guides, but is a god send for any Indy game producer, but well get into that later. New game journalism is a good thing, without it we would not know what games are coming out when and if they suit your personal preference of games. They’re basically creating a stir, some games that may not have grown to be popular may have never seen the light of day. New Game Journalism is probably one of the best ways for a new game designer to properly promote their game, with little expense.
Personally, I remember buying game magazines as a kid and they did in fact persuade me to buy one or two games I really enjoyed. Although I wasn’t interested in the rest of the games, its understandable that they have a broad market to sell to. This however was back in the 90s and early 00’s, when internet game reviews were not huge. Back than I believe it really did help sell games to large audiences. My mind frame when buying it was; “I have enough money for one game, I want that game to be a good one.” And magazines helped me with that choice. However now I often just look through gamespot.co.uk and look at the score. I know I shouldn’t, but I do, mainly because all of the text review is dribble, just one persons view of the game. Even when you look at the comments, its just “ I like this game “ or “ This game is shit “, which simply doesn’t help anyone. Everyones view of a game is different, from the journalist to the gamer who plays it. No one knows if you will enjoy a game, they only know what they like and hope you’ll like something similar, its like trying to find a decent prostitute girlfriend, you can never really tell if you like it until you buy it. Than if you don’t sell it to someone else or throw it in the bin.
The main problem with NGJ is that its human and you cant have a robot or android rate a game. Mainly because a human would have to program it to know what games are good. So no matter what you read or do or review, don’t forget the human element that the person reading is not the writer. Basicaly, any kind of journalism is never %100 accurate, so take everything you read with a pinch of salt, or in my case a spoon.
I don’t know how I feel about my own writing. I try to write how I would usually speak, or think in my head. I think that’s the best way to write, but obviously schooling tells you this is wrong and I should write everything exactly the same as everyone else, a brief understanding is all that’s needed I feel. Hay, AtlEasT 1 don’t Tlaksa lhej tis! That’d be terrible. I have been told that I write like a girl in instant messenger. That was from someone WHO TLKS LIK DIS. So either every male types like a retard or I when I had all those nose bleeds last month that was just me menstruating from my nose, who fucking knows.

NSFW - Link to crappy artwork!

....Every now and again I, as an artist, look at others work, as we all should. Its a good thing to do, get some ideas, give some ideas. Even if the artist is better than you or worse, there’s always something you can say above the basic " OMG AWESOME " or " THATS SHIT ", you can always give a good, in-depth comment, that not only can help you understand their work better, but also help the artist with some different methods of going about their task in the future.

That aside. I also look at really, really bad art, just to cheer myself up. Lets not lie here, who doesn’t look at a terrible drawing and go " HAHHH ". If the artist is genuinely trying to improve, they probably wouldn’t have drawn this stuff in the first place. Now would they? No. But its also probably because they dont know how/too stubborn/anxious/lazy/ext to do the things necessary to improving. I look at some really awful work that some kids draw and its reminding me that I too once wanted to become a better artist, but didnt know how and drew these awful monstrosities. And that makes me look at them in a different light.

You just hang in there man, draw every day, make the dream happen you know.

But sometimes I also look at some people I hate (personally)who also want to try to become artists, and notice that they havnt improved at all in 3 or more years. Not a bit, still drawing the same shit. And that makes me happy, It shouldn’t because its out of spite. This is only one or two people I know.

UNTILL TODAY. I found a website with awful art, a collection of it if you will. Deviantart? No, but youre close, alot of it is from there.
If you want a good chuckle at terrible drawings, (Hah, I almost said art), I recommend:
http://fuckyeahterribleart.tumblr.com (NOT SAFE FOR WORK)
But seriously, the title says it all " WHY WOULD YOU DRAW THAT?! "

Seriously, this website, is not safe for work, but is so terrible, you cant even tell what the fucks going on half the time. Seriously, why did they draw that stuff? Why? I dont understand man, I dont understand.

Okay, if you have looked through that website by now. Let me remind you that the world is a beautiful place and being alive in a world full of strange and unique creatures is a good thing.

WHAT DID YOU JUST SAY, TRISTAN?!

I said "The world is a awful place, because its filled with people who clearly dont like reality and wish to ruin it for everyone else. ".

And here is proof.

What the fuck are you doing?! Dont teach them to draw badly, they do that already!

Have a good day.

Games can do good. Even If they are shit. Apparently!

You're in for a ..... ride.... 

Yes, the greatest real life simulator ever created, but never published. It is the ultimate test of patience. It was made for a Pen and Teller game, where they just took the piss out of games in general. Although never published, it was leaked and became oddly popular.
The basic deal of this game is, you drive and bus with no one in it, with no oncoming traffic, forever, back and forth. Any attempt to pause the game sounds the horn (the start button), you cannot pull over, within 15 seconds a toe truck will come and take you back to the begining. You have to stay on the road, you cant leave beacuse your bus turns to the right, so you have to tap left every couple of seconds. And thats the game. After 8 hours of driving, you get one point. At 6 hours and 15 minutes, a bug will hit the windscreen. Thats all the action you will see.

This game has too much gore even for me.

How is this game popular? Maybe because it says so much about trying to emulate life perfectly in games. Who knows. Theres alot to take from such a simple, yet pain in the ass game. I dont think I'll go into the higher aspects of similicity and making something big out of it.

Sorry it's a bit loud, but thats because the game is so FUCKING HARD CORE!!

But some people have!  Now Im not one for helping other people, or caring. But Im just suprised that people are achualy doing this, with such a dick of a game. I think It has to be noted.
Desert Bus: For Hope. Is a charity based event (the 4th anual desert bus-off), that raises money to give hospitalised children games to play. Pretty touching. Well not really. But the fact of the matter is, people will play this god awful game for days, DAYS, non-stop. And get a huge cash pool going so others can play games when theyre sitting idle in bed. Pretty sweet. Too bad its american. But hay, who cares.
At the time of posting this they've been driving non stop for 14 hours. I could barely stand 15 minutes of video.
Not only do they play for insane amounts of time, they also live stream it, so you can get in on the, action? I dont know.
Check it out.
http://www.escapistmagazine.com/content/DesertBusForHope